Friday, July 31, 2009

BYU announces a new class for Fall '09- Bishop Prep 101

In a follow-up to BYU's continuously-full GA-Prep classes, they decided to expand their Church-prep series and add a class for those destined to be Bishops. Sorry, Ladies - until the Word comes down from The Brethren, it's a male-only class.

Topics covered will include:

  • What to expect during your first month in office
  • Delegation essentials
  • How to encourage successful YW activities on $5/week
  • Testimony meeting filler - a.k.a. How to turn every day events into faith-promoting stories
  • Pantyhose - Spiritual requirement for Sisters, or old-men fetish?
  • How to prioritize the 2 hours of free time that you'll enjoy each week while serving as a Bishop
  • Planning YM's activity on only $125/week
  • How to shake hands like a man, but cry like a woman
  • How to convincingly insinuate that you may know something about an interviewee through supernatural means
  • How to break the news to neighbors that they're going to have to work at Deseret Industries in order to be eligible for Church canned stew mystery meat
  • Accessorizing with a dark suit and white shirt, a.k.a. - The tie is your best friend
  • Climbing the Church ladder - Lessons in sincerity and humbleness
  • Shooting for the stars - Tips for getting called into the Stake Presidency

    1. baaaaa! this sounds like such a good class, bishop.

    2. Sign up, while you still can! Spaces are always limited for the Church prep classes at BYU, with all those hungry youngster with high hopes.

    3. Someone once told me that those who aspire to the calling of bishop deserve to be punished by being called to be bishop.